Parent Custody Blog

Helping keep you informed on Parent Custody issues….

I am a father of three boys.  I have one of them living with me as his mother had some “issues”.  I am the one with parent custody (placement is the actual correct term here). The other two are living with their mom and I haven’t seen them in about a year and a half due to her new husband and father in law both being lawyers and some mistakes in dealing with her on my part.  So obviously in this case she is the one who has parent custody.

 

One of the problems that I have seen in this system, which has worked both for and against me, is that unless you can afford a lawyer, your rights usually are not enforced.  This is something that can be good and bad, but will rarely take into account what is best for the child or children.  If both parties are reasonable, they can usually work things out, even if neither is entirely comfortable with the end result.  This is usually when both parents are looking out for the child as opposed to their own self-interests. 

 

The flip side of this is that one or both parties are not reasonable.  This is far more common, and will usually end with either the person who is able to best afford the lawyer getting their way, assuming it’s not totally outrageous, or an ongoing legal battle in which the children become pawns.  Neither of these options are good for the kids more often than not. 

 

People need to learn to drop their agendas, their personal hurts, their own selfish wants and whatever bad feelings are left over for the sake of their kids.  This in and of itself would solve a lot of issues when it comes to the parent custody issue.  Think about it, and then think of your kids.  It can make all the difference in the world.

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I have had the hardest time getting my visitation enforced because officers in my ex-wife’s county will not enforce an order or make an arrest. Can I make a citizens arrest for custody interference?
The children are 9 and 11, I have joint custody and there is a court order in place for visitation. Officers have been called out and will not take action. In Texas it is a state jail felony to commit child custody interference.

No, the police are not getting involved for this is not a criminal issue, it is a civil. They are not required to act on your frustration for the no-compliance of your ex-wife–especially if she is the custodial parent.
You can not make a citizens arrest for her violating a civil (child support) court order. You can and should go back to the divorce lawyer and take her back into court for contempt. . Laws in Texas are much different pertaining to this sort of contempt of the order and the law. You might have "joint" custody–but she has the parental right and the main residence over you. We also are not aware of all the facts of your decree– only what your inquiry pertains to–always two sides to a story.
You do not mention how old the children/child are/is? This also makes a difference.
Start thinking like a women–not a man and you will do much better–keep one step ahead of her.
I would advise you , once again, to seek the advice of your attorney.
Good luck to you.

Edit: While I agree that it is a State felony for interference with court order–what you presented does not meet the criteria, this is why the police are not stepping in to interfere.
I understand your frustration–but, the police are correct in what they are doing, whether you choose to understand or agree with their decision’s.

My fiance is in a rough situation. ive been with him for 5 years, he has two kids by the same woman..they were previously married, but divorced a couple days after the youngest was born. i am the only woman he has been with since their divorce. The kids are now 10 and 5, both girls. The mother isnt exactly "unfit" but shes not exactly the best mother either. She lived in MA with the kids at first. the baby was born here. when the baby turned about 1, she moved them to VA. Mom re-married only a couple months after the divorce was finalized. Not even a year later, mom divorced her new husband because he was abusive twoards her, but never laid a hand on the kids. She dated a new man while still living in VA. After another year or two they seperated. Mom has never worked a day in her life, she claims she wants to be a stay at home mom with the kids. She was living a stable life when she lived in MA and VA. She would only make about two trips a year to mass so the dad could see his kids, he pays her a decent amount in child support, and rarely gets to see them. He cannot take time off from work to travel to see them, or else he would fall behind on his child support, or risk losing his job all together for frequent trips, and again, mom has never worked, not even when they were married. Shes with a new man now, its almost like she has to be with somebody. She has a third child now, with her new boyfriend. Dads youngest (not this new child) is so confused, she understands who her father is, but still calls all moms boyfriends "daddy". The oldest misses her father so much. Mom decided to move to ohio only 4 months ago. She came for a visit not even two weeks ago, but left the kids with their aunt and went back to ohio. She has a tendency to dump the kids off with family..but never dad. She leaves them with her parents in VA for weeks on end, and they have spent time with their aunts and uncles who live in mass when she needs to figure out her self. The girls went back to ohio yesterday, The oldest called him crying, she wants to live with dad. He has never gone for custody in fear moms parents will hire her a good lawyer like they did in the divorce. We cannot afford a lawyer. The other day his oldest told him she has been researching how old she can be to make her own decisions on living arrangements, and said when she turns 12, she wants to live with dad. He never sees his kids, he crys over the void of missing his babies. We arnt well off, but we do have decent jobs, and are doing good for ourselves. We havent moved too much, but are willing to find a bigger place to make room for his girls if he was awarded any custody. Mom is moving the kids back and forth between states, never has a job, doesnt even have a car, leaves kids with family, and still tells him shes "doing whats best for the kids". wouldnt whats best be to move back to MA so dad and i can help with the kids? My question is…what is the likely he could obtain joint custody of them? And if he does, how does this work in two seperate states? or, what is the likely he could motion the court to move mom back to MA? He did sign a form stating she could move the kids out of state, but enough is enough, she needs to remember these are kids, they have feelings too, and when they call their father crying over missing him, wouldnt it be time to act like an adult and do whats best for them? All input is greatly appreciated. and again, sorry for ranting and if this was long, im just trying to figure out what his options are. Thanks!

Joint custody in two states will never happened. Shared maybe, like during summer and holiday breaks.

My question is, why in the world isn’t dad moving closer to his children? Once he establishes residency, he’ll be in a lot better position to go after complete custody. There should be nothing more important than his children, including geography, His children are crying out, he needs to man up and be there for them. No excuses.

Child Legal Rights? Custody?

Posted by admin on Aug-27-2010

So my parents are getting divorced and my mom wants to move to start over. We currently live in california and my dad is not letting us go willingly. So we have to have a child custody evaluator/ child mediator and we discovered through out own experience and that of others that she is biased. She seemed biased in the session with me and my two 12- year old sibilings, and she said some very innapropriate things to us and my mother. I am 16 years old and I would really do well with this move and it would be good for me. At what age am I legally allowed to decide which parent I’d like to live with (custody)? I believe in California it is 18, but I really need help getting the OK to move there. Any suggestions or legal tips is greatly appreciated. What can we do to try and get the court to approve the move without the consent of the father. He really wasnt a very actively involved dad but he’s put on a good show for the court and child custody evaluator. We really need help and any info that we could use to be able to move is SO appreciated. Many thanks!

At your age the Court will give great weight to your wishes regarding custody. The 12 year olds’ wishes will also be considered, but not as much. But Courts like to keep children together, so your testimony will be a big factor.

If you aren’t offered the opportunity to talk to the Judge, your mother should request that you be allowed to do so, in private. Just tell the Judge the truth, be very polite, and try not to be nervous. Don’t say really mean things about your Dad, but make it clear that he hasn’t been very interested in you in the past and you think that he would lose interest again as soon as the custody issue is settled.

You’re going with your Mom, I expect. Good luck.

Custody issues in a divorce case can easily become controversial and complicate the divorce process. While there are a variety of elements concerning custody, in this video Michigan lawyer Jacob Femminineo delves more deeply into two aspects of the matter: physical custody and legal custody.

Physical custody is, simply enough, where the child lives. Whether the child ultimately resides with the mother or father or is split between both parents homes will be decided during the divorce process. Typically, there is usually one parent who has sole physical custody.

The concept of legal custody is more involved. This type of custody takes into account all the major decisions regarding the child such as care, education, religion, and health. Michigan divorce cases involving children almost always end with joint legal custody. Watch this video to find out why, to get specific examples of situations involving legal custody, and to find out what circumstances will have a judge getting involved.

Duration : 0:3:56

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http://childjointcustody.com Child support payments are an area of great concern to parents involved in child custody disputes..you need to know how courts will calculate the child support payments you must pay. Stop by http://ChildJointCustody.com for your FREE child custody book-”Win Custody of Your Child-An Essential Guide for Parents”

Duration : 0:1:24

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Noted Family Law Attorney, Elisabeth Camaur, discussed the duties and responsibilities of exchanging the Declarations of Disclosure during a California divorce case. Ms. Camaur is an attorney and mediator in Orange County, California. Her office also provides collaborative law services. She is a Certified Family Law Specialist by the State Bar of California’s Board of Legal Specialization and has practiced family law in California since 1993. Her office works on cases involving divorce, child custody, visitation, support, registered domestic partners, restraining orders and prenuptial agreements.

Duration : 0:3:51

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San Diego Divorce Attorney http://www.stevenmbishop.com/ At the Law Office of Steven M. Bishop, CFLS, a family law and divorce lawyer in San Diego, he and his staff are committed to providing professional, dedicated, and highly responsive legal representation for people going through a divorce or
family difficulties. We are a full-service family law
practice offering experienced information on divorce law
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Divorce Help & Family Law matters we handle include: Divorce Law,
Legal Separations, Family Law, Child Custody and Visitation, Child Support & Spousal, Paternity — Unmarried Parents, Non-parental Custody & Visitation (grandparents, siblings), Modifications to: child custody, visitation, spousal support.

Duration : 0:1:17

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http://GoodHelpHere.com/child-custody — Child Custody Issues

Divorce is a painful situation for anyone who has married.

It is even more painful for the children of that past relationship.

When a custodial issue rise, the ensuing legal conflict can make turmoil for the

children and the family generally.

There are some ways to ease the difficultness for children when custodial issues are

raised.

Speak favourably of your ex-spouse in the front of the children.

Avoid interrogating your children about the other parent’s activities and situation

after a visit.

Encourage flexibility in the relationship by being willing to compromise on

visitation issues.

Maintain and improve the relationship with the ex-spouse.

To learn more about Child Custody Issues, please visit:
http://GoodHelpHere.com/child-custody

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Discussion on CHILD CUSTODY LAWS-Fathers denied child custody-demand SHARED PARENTING – p7 news 8aug10

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