My friend has been asking for my advice, sometimes I’m unsure on what to tell him because I don’t know how certain legal aspects work.
My friend’s girlfriend was living with him during the time that she got pregnant. Soon after when it was time for her to give birth, she went to move home which is in another state to have her daughter. He then moved to her state in order to be with her and his child; He had a decent paying job and all of the money he made went directly into her bank account. Eventually they broke up and he find out that during the end of her pregnancy she was talking to another man behind his back. Regardless, he was still living with her for the sake of their child. But the week after they broke up she started dating this guy. She did say he was allowed to live with her but she wanted to continue dating different people. Given these circumstances, he decided to move back home because he couldn’t be with her while she was dating someone else. He didn’t have anyone while he was living with her and his daughter(such as family, friends, etc.) Now they fight frequently and many times she will not let him see or talk to their child. She wants child support, but now he is stuck looking for another job in his state.
She treats him disrespectfully and blocks him on face book where she updates pictures and videos of her daughter. Not only this, she does talk lowly on her FB about him and how he isn’t a good father. She did re-add him at one point just to taunt him about how great her new boyfriend is and how he’d make a good father. My friend kept texts and messages that supports his side on proof on how she treats him and kept the child from him. She is completely unwilling to try and make the relationship work and she’s trying to have her new boyfriend take the place of being the father; This man has only been in her life for a couple of months. So right now my friend is a train wreck burning and all he wants the rights for his child and doesn‘t have money to pay child support. But it’s impossible by the way she keeps her from him and she lives in another state.
What should he do about this?
First, he has no legal rights to see the child. He voluntarily gave up that right the moment he had sex with her. Now only a court can grant him those rights, which will be in her state. However, he cannot even consider doing that until he is under a court order for child support. These will teach him what he needs to know.
http://dads-house.org/Paternity-WhatMenNeed2Know
http://ChildSupportRights.org/WhatPayersNeed2Know
http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLC8077B1999DA0324
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Federal Child Support Enforcement Handbook for Non-Custodial Parents
http://childsupportrights.org/
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To learn a father’s rights, join Dads House Educational Center in Yahoo Groups. It’s free to join and access all materials. You also associate with other fathers going through, and have already gone through, the same issues. We have an Educational Manual that teaches everything that needs to be known in addressing your legal issues. Mention your question here when asked why you want to join, as well as your state?
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Dads_House_Ed_Ctr/
http://www.youtube.com/DadsHouseEdCtr
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2nd Wife Club in Yahoo Groups, for those brave enough to take on a man with "baggage".
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/2ndwifeclub/
http://www.facebook.com/proudstepmoms
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For 22 years, I have volunteered my time working with divorced/single fathers dealing in family law issues, such as child support, teaching them about what the states are not telling support obligors.
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